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By Diane Griffith, HealthAtoZ writer
Whether they live a mile apart or are separated by several states, a special bond exists between grandparents and grandchildren. Grandparents provide children with unconditional love. In return, they get back what they give and more - including healthier, happier and more active lives.
That unconditional love makes children feel safe and secure. It helps them develop trust and independence. It helps them build self-esteem, take initiative and feel that they are lovable and competent. It enhances their health physically, emotionally and spiritually. It also helps to improve their developmental and learning skills.
Grandparents teach children what they wouldn't learn anywhere else. Throughout their lives, children remember the skills, knowledge, values and attitudes that their grandparents pass down.
Children who have strong relationships with grandparents tend to do better in school, have a stronger sense of family and feel more comfortable with older people than those who don't. These children are also less likely to become involved with drugs or violence.
Long-distance grandparenting
How do you keep the grandchild-grandparent ties strong when grandparents don't live nearby? Here are some tips:
- Send grandparents e-mails, pictures and videos of your child regularly.
- Have the grandparent read and record a children's book for your child, then play it at bedtime.
- Have your child draw pictures or write letters once a week and send them to the grandparents.
- Have photographs around the house of the grandparents and show them to your child frequently.
- Have your child and the grandparents telephone each other regularly.
- Visit grandparents on holidays or special occasions.
Nearby grandparenting
If grandparents live nearby, here are some ways to strengthen the relationship:
- Arrange dinners, picnics and barbecues with grandparents.
- Ask grandparents if they'd like to volunteer in your child's classroom.
- Invite grandparents to your child's sporting events and activities.
- Encourage grandparents to spend time alone with each child.
- Ask a grandparent to teach your child a favorite hobby.
Playing with grandchildren
Grandparents sometimes wonder how to entertain their grandchildren. The truth is, very young children really don't need to be entertained - in fact, they are usually the ones who provide the entertainment. They make up games and imaginary situations and ask only that grandparents play along.
Grandparents can connect with their grandchildren by:
- Showering them with affection. To reach their full cognitive, emotional and social potential, children need to feel special.
- Listening. A troubled child may need to confide in a grandparent.
- Making them feel valued. By providing comfort, a grandparent makes a child feel safe, secure and lovable.
- Offering them undivided attention.
- Sharing traditions. Showing children their roots gives them a sense of unity and belonging.
Keeping active
Grandparents don't need to run marathons to keep up with their grandchildren. They should choose physical activities that match their strength and stamina levels. When children visit, grandparents can take them on walks and show them the neighborhood. If kids find walking interesting, they may continue the habit throughout their lives.
Playing hide and seek, flying a kite or pushing a child on a swing isn't overly strenuous, but gets a grandparent up and moving. At the same time, the grandparent gets the best benefit of all - the chance to play, pretend and laugh with a grandchild as the bond grows stronger.
This article was reviewed and updated June 2007.
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